When you feel overwhelmed, lost or disorientated from emotional states, it can be beneficial to take a moment to map out all the elements of your mind. The Reflective Mind Map will bring clarity to your present state, offer a moment of relief and give validation for the past experiences that have lead to the present situation.
Often, when we find ourselves in social conflict, our brain can become fatigued and it can be difficult to feel balanced. We can ease our suffering and confusion by writing down the different elements of our life that our mind is occupied with.
Elements of the Mind
1. Emotions
How am I feeling right now?
When recording our emotions, we want to identify the specific feeling, like sadness or anger, then identify the object of the emotion, the thing that is making us upset.
In this process of emotional identification, we want to be aware of the Burns' Cognitive Distortion checklist and offer ourselves realistic or rational responses to any distorted thoughts that we may be having. See Feeling Good Tool and use the relevant Burns techniques discussed in the book like the Daily Record of Dysfunctional Thoughts or the Disarming Technique.
2. Situations
What happened or what is going on?
Certain situations can cause significant distress for us; especially if something meaningful to us has come into jeopardy. For us to make sense of the past, or determine a present decision for the future, it can be helpful for us to understand the elements of the situation. Taking a moment to understand the circumstance we are in, can give us the awareness to make the most optimal decision for the best interest of ourselves and others.
3. People
Who is involved and what meaning do they have?
Understanding what happened in a specific social context can be done by writing a report on the interaction(s) that we've had with others. Different people yield different kinds of relationships and hence hold different meanings and roles for us. When we break down the complexity of our relationships with others in terms of events, behaviours, what was said, beliefs, the other's emotions and expectations, we can better know what the next step is and apply a more realistic, empathetic attitude.
4. State
What is going on with my body?
Sometimes our mind can be distorted due to the influence of drugs or alcohol, lack of sleep or food, injury or medical/physiological conditions. It is important to isolate these sensations or states and not attribute them to external people or events.
5. Environmental Assessment
What is going on around me?
Our environments have a tremendous effect on us. Sometimes we can see the degree of our internal conflict reflected in the state of our home; whether things are a mess or things are clean. If there is social conflict between others and we can hear them, it can create irritability, or, if we are not mindful, we can mirror their emotions.
Once we are aware that there are elements of our environment that are not the way we like, we can take time to make small changes here and now to build towards dealing with the larger issues. Cleaning the house, as dreadful as it may be when we are upset, offers a visible example of accomplishment to feel good about.
6. Training and Habit Progress
What progress have I made in the habits that are good for me to cultivate and the ones I could do without?
Having an assessment of my progress with my habits gives me more awareness and control to change them. In times of disorientation, I can feel good about my recent progress in exercise, my nutrition, training in sports or music, study skills or research, time management, and developing social skills with others. Accurately assessing my progress in the different areas I want to grow, will give me greater control over where I can invest attention and effort.
7. Reflective Mindful Meditation
What other things that I cannot think of are actually bothering me?
I can take a moment to engage in the relaxation response through calming my mind in meditation and find that some thoughts that keep persisting. Some of these persisting thoughts are sources of internal anxiety or discomfort that have not been responded to. Sources of dissonance that are not responded to accumulate inside of my being, festering my experiences and life.
We can remember the thoughts that are distracting us during our No Mind Meditation and record them down at an alternative Reflective Mindful Meditation time. During the No Mind Meditation, we are engaging in the relaxation response through emptying our mind. In the Reflective Mindful Meditation, we are attempting to focus our attention on the things that trouble us, to determine the nature of them. While in Reflective Mindful Meditation, my attention is fixated on the troubling issues and I inhibit thoughts that distract me from the issue I am understanding.
8. Action Plan and Visualization
Now that I have assessed my mind, what can I do with the information I have found?
I am able to create an action plan for myself such that I learn from my mistakes and grow from my reflection. Sometimes we may not know all the answers to the troubles we are to solve and we have the option to research or ask help from others.
Once I have determined areas of growth, I can now visualize my pre-scripted actions for future situations. Through the process of visualizing each step of a better self, I reinforce my performance when in the present. If I intend on quitting cigarettes, I can visualize resisting the physical withdrawal temptation or the social pressure from friends. Visualizing how I ought to act instead of how I usually act will lead me to cultivating healthy lifestyle habits.
The visualization process can also be an anxiety reducing technique when we are unsure or concerned about a future event.
Taking the time to categorize these different elements of our minds, date and file the document (I recommend using google docs) can offer great benefit. One is able to track their progress over time and learn from their own growth and reflective processes.
AJ 6.2.18, 13.3.18, 16.5.18, 29.5.18, 19.7.18, 27.3.20
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